Episode 243: How to Make a Habit 'Sticky' (Part 1)
How often do you find yourself using willpower when you’re trying to change your diet, or get in an exercise routine, or implement a better sleep schedule? I’m guessing a lot.
I have to choose to get up early to make myself a healthy breakfast.
I have to choose not to eat the donuts my coworker brought to work today.
I have to choose to go to the gym at the end of the day instead of flopping off the couch.
I have to choose not to reach for that big bag of chips when I finally do sit down to relax.
That’s a lot of decision making. That’s a lot of willpower. That’s a lot of energy spent fighting against your brain’s innate instinct to do what’s comfortable and easy.
What’s the remedy to this conundrum of wanting to reach certain goals but struggling so hard to take consistent action towards them?
Habits.
Anywhere between 40 to 95 percent of our behavior (including our thoughts) are habitual. Meaning we do them automatically, without thinking, and without the use of willpower.
So if we can match up our goals with these daily, ingrained patterns, that’s when we can truly say we’ve changed our lifestyle, and the results of those habits will be - more or less- permanent.
But knowing we need to rely on healthy habits and knowing what it takes to actually build them are two different things. Which is why this episode is dedicated to the latter.
Today we’re going to talk about the anatomy of a habit and what elements you can manipulate to create lasting change, and next week we'll dive into how to set yourself up for success when starting a new habit and what to do when you find that you keep falling off a habit you’re trying to form.
The Anatomy of a Habit:
There are three parts of a habit: the trigger, the habit itself, and the reward, and we can turn the dials of each depending on what we’re trying to achieve and what’s easiest to manipulate in the situation
Trigger:
The trigger is what signals the start of a habit.
You could have an action as a trigger, for example watching tv may be the trigger for mindless snacking.
You could have a time of day be a trigger, like 8 am being the time you brush your teeth.
You could have a visual trigger; I used to use a giant pink water bottle to remind me to stay hydrated.
Or an emotion can be a trigger which is often the case with emotional eating.
So when you’re thinking about building a new habit, ask yourself what the trigger for that habit will be.
A note on triggers: we have lots of negative triggers for lots of negative habits. If you can change the trigger (for example creating distance between you and an unhealthy individual), do that. But if you can’t change the trigger - for example it’s your stressful job - you have to change the response to the trigger. Which brings us to the habit…
Habit:
Then we have the habit itself. Your choice of habit is very important. I know they say shoot for the moon and you’ll land among the stars, but when it comes to habits, shoot for the moon and you’ll likely land on your ass.
Go with habits you know you can stick with even on busy/stressful days, go with habits that you can build on, go with habits that make sense for your personality.
If on a scale of 1-10 where 10 means you’re 100% confident you’ll be able to stick with the habit, only choose habits that are an 8 or above. It’s lower than that, we need to break the habit down into more bite sized pieces.
A note on habits: when you’re trying to change the response you have to a negative trigger, part of being successful is slowing down and creating space between trigger and habit. Maybe an argument with your mom would normally send you right to a bottle of wine. Pause. Take a breath. It’s in that gap that you’ll be able to make a different choice than your autopilot-self would.
Reward
The reward is the reason you do the habit in the first place.
This is where it gets a bit sticky because our brain prioritizes immediate rewards, but we benefit most from long term rewards.
Your habit of eating pretzels and watching tv every night gives you the immediate reward of relaxation and happiness hormones. But in the long term it’s sabotaging both your physical and mental wellbeing.
This is why we have to be intentional about building in immediate rewards for the habits that give us long term rewards. Sometimes that’s with an actual, tangible reward and sometimes it’s about paying closer attention to a positive physical experience.
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Now that you know the anatomy of a habit, you're probably feeling pretty motivated to get to work changing your own routines to make healthy living easier.
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We'll be diving deep into the topics that show up in my practice again and again. Things like how to meal prep without spending hours in the kitchen, overcoming cravings without willpower, learning how to stay consistent through busy seasons, travel, nights out, etc, and overcoming diet confusion and information overload.
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The Club Members: You can find the full episode inside The Vault. Just head to the 'Habit Change and Personal Development' module. After listening, pop into our community and share your biggest take away and one action step you're going to take this week to get back to your healthy habits!
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